On May 20th, I was released from a military hospital to take my son home for the first time. It should have been joyous, but I was so swollen from my planned cesarean section that it hurt my feet to even walk. I knew swelling could be a post operative side effect, but I didn’t think it would be this bad. Not to mention, the right upper quadrant pain that the simethecone I was prescribed wasn’t even touching. Two days later, we’re in the hospital for the two day newborn evaluation and my son is admitted for failure to thrive. I’m clearly stressed but I inform the newborn clinic provider that this swelling in experiencing is getting worse and the heart palpitations are new. But clearly, I’m an emotional wreck because my son has lost almost two pounds since his birth, he’s being admitted and I’m feeling like a failure more than ever. So, those symptoms are chalked up by the medical provider- and myself (ironically also a medical provider)- as anxiety. As my husband, son, and I are being escorted to the inpatient area where my son will be treated, my vision starts to have floaters; but hey, this is part of sleep deprivation too, right? Later that evening, my husband begs me to go downstairs to the ER since my heart palpitations are worsening and I’m feeling short of breath. With the C section, I’m scared for a pulmonary embolism, so I agree and get seen at the ER. First, the EKG and vitals. My BP: 149/99. Unusual for me in general, but I was also on 81mg aspirin throughout my pregnancy because I don’t know my biological mother’s medical history. Within 15 minutes, a CXR is ordered, I’m visited by the doctor and told it’s likely a PE, but they’ll need a CT chest and abdomen to confirm. 20 minutes after that, I’m started on a magnesium bolus, visited by the OBGYN on call and informed I’d be inpatient and separated from my 5 day old son.

Here’s the kicker, the day I left mother baby, I knew the swelling was too much to be normal. My blood pressure was elevated then but because I was released shortly after breakfast and had a cup of coffee, my providers dismissed it as elevated due to caffeine consumption. That right upper quadrant pain I was feeling, I kept asking for simethecone thinking it was gas pain and informing my nursing team that my stomach, not my c section area, hurt. Yet all of this was dismissed because of the operation.

I’m glad I listened to my husband. Without him advocating for me, to me… who knows what could have happened.

My labor and delivery experience wasn’t what I thought it would be, my first week as a mother was even worse, but I’m grateful that my husband could see I wasn’t my normal self. I should have advocated more for myself before I left Mother-Baby.