My darling daughter Niamh Ellen Marie Hayes was born in January 2020 a few days after she died from complications of HELLP syndrome. She was our very much longed for IVF baby, our first child. I had reported reduced movements just before Christmas and told it was normal as I had an anterior placenta. I’d felt her move a lot since 16 weeks and by then I was 24 weeks pregnant.

Over Christmas and New Year I felt worse and worse, developing neck pain, back pain, insomnia, breathlessness and awful heartburn. I’d been given the impression by my midwife that nobody was available over the festive period to see me. I waited until January and called again, again she told me that Niamh and I were both fine but she did not check my urine or blood pressure. I saw my GP a few days later and they listened to Niamh’s heartbeat with a stethoscope, they said we were fine and sent me away. That night I felt Niamh suddenly move in the bath, at the time I thought it was a good sign but I realised afterwards that this was when she died, I never felt her move again.

A few days later I started bleeding, my midwife told me it was probably thrush and if it got worse to go to hospital. It stopped but I developed a spot in my eye. I suggested with migraines so I thought the spot was just a migraine coming, my husband had had enough and thankfully decided we were going to hospital. There we found out our sweet girl had died at 27 weeks. The hospital team were amazing. They initially talked about sending me home to come back and get induced until they took my blood pressure which was sky high and ran blood tests showing I had HELLP syndrome.

I know now my back and neck pain was upper gastric pain, I know now how seriously unwell I was. I know now my midwife and GP should have known better. I got to spend 4 precious days with my beautiful daughter in hospital. I miss her every single day and I love her so very much. I wish desperately that all pregnant women were warned more clearly of the signs of pre-eclampsia and HELLP syndrome. I had looked my symptoms up but as I didn’t have everything listed and wasn’t have seizures I thought I couldn’t have it. My only risk factors were Niamh was my first pregnancy and she was conceived through IVF so my concerns were dismissed as being overly anxious. I wish I’d been taken more seriously and I wish she was here.