Feeling Confused...

Are you considering having another child after preeclampsia? Trying again after preeclampsia can be an emotional challenge. You can find support with others who share your concerns here.
mymiracles2
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Re : Feeling Confused...

Postby mymiracles2 » Thu Jan 27, 638924 10:40 pm

I understand how you feel, the guilt:( It is difficult to wrap your head around and even moreso when everyone around you seems to be pregnant! It is always wonderful (NOT) when our loved ones give us their opinion about wanting more children. That is why this forum is so wonderful, it gives me a renewed faith in myself:)

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kellikbock
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Re : Feeling Confused...

Postby kellikbock » Mon Jan 17, 638924 1:58 pm

Yes, breathe...you know more now than your last pregnancy & you can be your best advocate! Stick up for yourself if you think that your doctor/midwife isn't taking you seriously. Let them know up front at that first appointment your fears and history. Now that you are pregnant again, I'm sure that you'll be watched very closely & call them whenever you have questions & just do what you can to help yourslef relax.
Don't don't, DO NOT blame yourself for what happened last time. I have a great friend who runs marathons & was in excellent shape that developed Severe PE and HELLP pretty early. Sometimes, it just happens for one reason or another. She ended up have a blood clotting issue that she never would have known about, but her MFM (high risk doctor) found it out. SO, make sure that your doctor tests you for whatever he/she could test you for while you're pregnant.
Try to take it easy on yourself & thank God that you can even get pregnant in the first place. That is a miracle in itself that some people can't achieve...count your blessings, my friend & take one day at a time! You'll do great! (OH, and this forum is GREAT to ask questions on if you need help!)

klutsyone01
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Re : Feeling Confused...

Postby klutsyone01 » Sun Jan 16, 638924 9:05 pm

we are only seven weeks along. my first doctor appointment is apr 21. im so scared. my blood pressure never totaly went back to before son bp. im still slightly overweight. im always stressed out. AAAAAAAHHHH!!! my husband wants us to think positive but HELLO hes not the one that feels like they failed their baby. my one job and i messed it up. i know it wasnt my fault and there is nothing i did that caused it but i still feel that way. im terrified it will come earlier with this one. maybe if i had already talked to the doctore ide feel better. also i didnt know to get tested for any underlying conditions until i came to this sight and i was already pregnant when i found this place. so im worried about that. im worried that because im military and we dont have many options about doctos that ill end up with an idiot that doesnt take it seriously, like the midwives did last time. too top that off my sons only seven monthes old. breathing, in....out.....

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kellikbock
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Re : Feeling Confused...

Postby kellikbock » Sun Jan 16, 638924 2:21 pm

I feel for you, klutsyone01...I'm sorry for your last exerience; I'm sorry that you feel cheated. I think that women that experience any unforseen problems in their pregnancies feel cheated. It's natural to mourn, I think. How far along are you?

klutsyone01
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Re : Feeling Confused...

Postby klutsyone01 » Sun Jan 16, 638924 12:15 pm

i was pregnat with seven other girls at work, all due within two monthes of each other. My son came out first, because of severe preeclampsia. i didnt go home with him, he didnt room in with me and no we didnt have any normal labor and newborn experiences. I resented everyone of them and their chubby healthy newborns. i resented every mother that left the hospitol with their baby when i left mine there. it kills me to this day. I hate it. Why not me? why was it us? im pregnant agin and im terrified! i cant stand it! i cant cope with the fact that it propibly happen again. i resent that i will never have a normal pregnancy or birth. ive always wanted three or more kids, always. my husband laid doen the law, if we get pre e with this one we are done. he will get snipped and there will be no bargaining. i morn the chance to be normal, to decside the size of our family based on whats right for us not out of fear of a disease

sheri-ct
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Re : Feeling Confused...

Postby sheri-ct » Wed Jan 05, 638924 6:17 pm

I can relate. I have 3 beautiful kids after dealing with infertility (and pre-e!) for the past 7 years and I'd love another, but I know it's not possible. You are not being greedy....the heart wants what the heart wants. I'm sorry. ((((((((HUGS))))))))

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kellikbock
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Re : Feeling Confused...

Postby kellikbock » Mon Nov 08, 638923 6:52 pm

Thanks! I've had people from all walks of life give me their opinion on our having another baby. Sheesh, as if I am not scared enough about it, already...I had my pediatrician tell me that if something happened to me, my husband would probably remarry & since my kids are so young, they wouldn't remember me at all & some other woman would be raising my kids...=( Well, if that didn't have me leaving depressed, I don't know what will!
It truly is like mourning the loss of a child without having the child. It's a weird feeling & very unexpected. While these friends of mine (so many I'm losing count now) are pregnant & celebrating the births of healthy babies w/ a care free pregnancy...I'm being ripped apart inside. It really does ache, and I didn't see this coming. I don't know if I can handle these baby showers. sigh...

bernadic
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Re : Feeling Confused...

Postby bernadic » Mon Nov 08, 638923 1:28 pm

You are not alone. I feel the same way too. I cannot/ am not able to have another due to a high FSH and very limited infertility options due to the severe PE I had. We wanted 3. I am very lucky to have my one son, but I am very sad and jealous when other people are preggers and I can't be. I become sad and emotional too. I feel robbed of the entire pregnancy thing. I feel like I missed out on a happy shower, exciting delivery, and even bringing a baby home. I came home without my son-he had to stay for 3 months. Nothing is worse than coming home to an empty crib not knowing if it will be filled with a baby or not. I even feel jealous when I hear/see new moms being wheeled out of the hospital with their new babies in tow. I think it is natural for us PE moms to feel that way. Hugs to you!

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kellikbock
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Feeling Confused...

Postby kellikbock » Mon Nov 08, 638923 12:15 pm

OK, here I go again...
A lot of my friends are pregnant, and I'm so jealous and a little bitter. When another one pops up & announces their pregnancy I feel ill.
Yes, I have three blessing whom I'm so thankful for, but we had always planned on having four kids. Or maybe, it is just the fact that it seems like my body has said "no" to having another baby...or maybe I'm just jealous that I couldn't just have another one if I wanted & it not be a huge deal & terrifying! I'm not sure what it is.
I feel like my body betrayed me; I feel stupid for even saying this when I have three kids (like greedy or something); I feel like I've been mourning our forth child that we've not had since the birth of my last & my PP PE.


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