I am new to the forum

A place for those bereaved to receive and offer support
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Re : I am new to the forum

Postby angelkat » Fri Jan 21, 2005 05:43 am

Sorry to have to welcome you to this forum. I am so sorry for your loss. Your story sounds a like I mine. My Drew (Andrew) is 14 , remarried and we loss our first baby together....

I want to invite you to read the threads in the G&L Forum as there is alot of good advise. This group is a great support system!!!...

Sending you prayers of comfort and peace...

Moderator Grief and Loss
Mommy to
Drew(14)PE 37 wks
Ky (12)PE 34 wks
~i~ Katlyne(12/9/02-04/02/03)25 wks
Casey - 34wks Born 7/29/04
Katlyne's Tribute Site
http://forevernetwork.com/lifestories/l ... ope&Sort=V

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Joined: Fri Jan 21, 2005 04:31 am

I am new to the forum

Postby kfreeman » Fri Jan 21, 2005 05:11 am

I am new here and have been reading through the posts for a few days and have realized that I am not alone in my tragedy. My son Justin was stillborn at 24 weeks on December 26, 2004. I had severe pre-eclampsia and was in the hospital for 6 days. My first and only other son Andrew was delivered by C-section at 32 weeks almost 14 years ago and then too there were complications, but not near as severe as with Justin.

This is my second marriage and first child for my husband and I of almost 3 years. We had not planned on having any children for various reasons, but then we were surprised with the fact that we were going to have a baby. It took some adjusting on my part to deal with the fact that life was changing dramatically and my husband and I were truly looking forward to raising our son. This has been a very tough challenge for both of us, but especially me. I cry every day as I am trying to understand why this happened to us, and wish that things could be different. I know that I can't change things and I have to learn to accept and cope with our loss. I have been spending time with our pastor talking about my feelings of anger, guilt, hopelessness, fear and self-asteem.

It is difficult to hear from friends and family that everything happens for a reason, but I will never understand what the reason is. Last night I went to my first support group meeting through the hospital. I was the only one who showed up due to the weather and I was surprised to find that one of the grief counsellors was an old friend from my teenage years. It was her first night to help with this group and she felt that she was sent to me on purpose. I do hope that next month more mom's and dad's will show up to share their feelings so that I can relate and understand that I am not alone with my feelings.

I am 38 and my husband will turn 45 tomorrow and our next challenge in the future will be to decide if we want to try to have another child. I was very much looking forward to having Justin and had wished that my husband and I would have decided to have children earlier in our relationship. We have been together for almost 6 years, but only married for almost 3. My husband has been very supportive, not always understanding what I am going through, but he is trying. I know he is grieving also in his way and I grieve in my own way. It is comforting to read through the forum here and I do hope that I find some peace just so that I can at least begin putting things into perspective. Thank you for listening to my story and if anyone has any advice please feel free to express your thoughts.

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